motherly advice
she told me
they should always love you more
she raised me
to love above and beyond that
she showed me
strength where surrender was best
she deceived me
with perseverance over peace
she taught me
how to rationalise hurt
she consoled me
and reminded me of what she had said
In my first relationship, my mother passed me this one piece of advice. It stuck - and it’s a concept I’ve grappled with for a decade now, with every crush, boyfriend, potential, hypothetical. This piece is my reflection on growing up - of a relationship shift between mother and daughter, unlearning unhealthy lessons and understanding child behaviours that no longer serve me as an adult - all whilst respecting and loving the woman that brought me to life. It broke my heart when I penned this poem, when I made these realisations in therapy - and a deep gut-feeling still stirs every time I read this. 